The Low-Down on Loving Your Body: How to Embrace Every Curve, Dip, and Angle


For a long time, I’ve struggled with loving myself. My spirit, my sexuality, my strength, and more. Those parts of me definitely weren’t something to write home about but, ever since I’ve embraced them, I knew what part to tackle next: my body.

I had my daughter when I was 16, I was still in pretty good shape, and didn’t care much about outer appearance but over time, I developed a subconscious dislike for how I looked. One guy told me I was voluptuous and my first thought was, Well, damn. Are you trying to be nice about it or …?”

Also, social media makes it so easy for me to fall into the trap of the SnapBack so I started judging my body a little bit.

It took a few good looks in the mirror and a few pep-talks for me to remember that I’m perfectly fine! If you could be a fly on the wall in my bedroom, you’d hear me saying stuff like, “Dang, Jewel. I see you!” and “Mmmm, girl. Okay. Look at you go.” I’ve, literally, become my own hype-man. And that’s the type of wisdom I share with my friends, family, and kids.

We, as women, have a ton of unrealistic views on what outer beauty and sexiness is. Your thighs touch? Okay, girl. Thicker than a Snicker. You better go’head!

You’re flat-chested? Babe, you never have to experience trying to find the PERFECT bra. You’re blessed, ma’am.

We come in all shapes and sizes! Who’s to say we’re not beautiful?  We are GORGEOUS! We shine. We glisten. We GLOW.

And, yes, I know that what I’m saying is easier said than done (or believed), so I’m going to share the few tips that helped me boost my body-love. Get into them, down under!

1. I make sure I’m healthy. 

One of my top rules was to make sure that I always stayed healthy. There’s no sense in loving how you look when you’re steadily battling (and not dealing with!) high blood pressure, diabetes, hypertension, obesity, and all that bad juju. Come on, girl.

The way you treat your insides will show on the outside. I watch my weight, I’m careful of what I eat, I try to get some type of workout in throughout my day, etc. Do what you have to do but get it done.

2.I talk to myself. 

Like I said, I’m my own hype-man! Nobody’s going to cheer for you as loud or hard as you would for yourself! When you get up in the morning and shuffle to the bathroom, look in the mirror and say something like, Aye, girl! You lookin bootiful.” Not those exact words but you get the point! (And, yes, I do talk to myself like that.) Boost yourself!

If you could write all of your best traits on your body, for the world to see, what would you write? Say those words to yourself! Strong, sexy, smart, funny, determined, relentless, blessed, loving, beautiful, amazing… you see what I’m getting at.

3. I remind myself that the views of others don’t mean sh*t!  

One of my family members compared me to someone I was once close to and said, “She had a baby, too. She got her body back real quick. What’s taking you so long?”  😒That bothered me for a bit because then I put standards on myself according to how someone else thought my body should look.

Someone else, that I hold dear to my heart, once said to me “You’re starting to look like Jeannie*” and kind of made a stank face, after saying it. I brushed it off but it just annoys me that people say things like that and think it’s okay.

It may come as a shock to those family members but I actually like my body and have no problem with how I look. There are some parts of me that I’d like to work on but that’s for me to observe, comment on, and change, if I choose to do so.

It’s MY body. I’m healthy and doing great at staying that way, and that’s all that matters. And, girl, that’s what you have to remember. People are always going to have something to say or something they want to change about YOU and YOUR body. Shut them out. And, if you’re feeling it, shut them down on site. Best believe, THEY won’t comment on YOUR body anymore.


Those are my 3 tips but I also wanted you to know that I’ve deeply considered going under the knife and am not totally against it.

I’m not against people doctoring their bodies according to how they want to look. It’s all about comfort and happiness, you know? Some people hit the gym and some hit the surgeon’s office. I do think there’s a point where it gets to be too much and could potentially be harmful to one’s health, like removing ribs and what not. There’s no shame in adding and removing things but make sure it’s all healthy and what you really want.

You have to believe that you are beautiful. Your mind, your soul, your spirit, your heart, and your body. Every inch of you is worth loving so, babe, LOVE IT! Feed good & positive vibes into your life and watch how that love shows. Tall, short, thick, thin, … whatever! Love yourself.

Embrace yourself.

No one’s going to love you as much as you love you, so do just that. It all starts with acceptance, even the parts you don't like.

Comment below which tip helped you the most when it comes to your own body image? What was your favorite part of what Jewel dropped in here?

This article was written by #SelfishBabe: Jewel

Jewel is a NYC native with a love for traveling, writing, and laughter. An HR Guru by day and writer by night, Jewel finds peace in sharing advice on educational & career choices, relationship woes, and greatest love of all: self love. 

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