A #SelfishTruth: 6 Tips To Help You Navigate Your Self-Love Journey

A #SelfishTruth - Jewel.png

For some people, self-love is a process that starts as a result of a traumatic experience or just a moment in time when enough has literally become enough & it’s time for a change.

My self-love journey started in late July, 2016. Someone I held close to my heart told me outright that they didn’t respect me, and didn’t have a reason as to why. For some, that’s something that would roll right off one’s back, but it struck me.

It made me realize that,

1) nobody’s going to respect me more than me


2) nobody’s going to love me more than me.

And that’s when my journey began.

While there are numerous steps and tips I can provide you to help work through this very tedious & trying journey, I’d much rather share some thoughts & ideas to meditate on and consider.

Because this process is one of choice and genuine intention, here are some things to ponder while you embark upon this healing journey.

You won’t be able to teach anyone how to love you unless you love yourself.

We, as women, want love. To some extent, it’s something we crave.

You need to, first, understand what it takes to care for, love, and cherish yourself before putting that expectation on someone else.

Comparison is the thief of joy.

Girl, if you keep comparing yourself to others, you’ll never be happy with yourself. You’ll never fully love & appreciate who you are because you’ll be too busy focusing on the qualities of others. When it comes to self-love, it’s all about you.

Pay attention to who you are and how you want to better yourself and watch how you flourish.

And if you see someone else on a similar journey, cheer them on. Be their hype man. We’re here to help one another, not compete with each other.


Make peace with your past.

One of the most difficult parts of this process, for me, was acknowledging everything I’ve done & had been through in the past. I had to remember certain things and realize that I’m not that person anymore. And, babe, you have to do the same.

Make peace with your past. Take note on how it’s changed you for the better making you a stronger individual.

Remember where and who you were and use that as fuel to do better.

Speak over yourself. Your heart is always listening. – Ma’am, you need to pray over yourself & claim positive outcomes on your life. With all the negativity and bad juju in the air, it is necessary and imperative that you fight those things with positive affirmations, prayer, and good vibes.

When you speak these things over yourself, you have to be sincere. You have to believe and wholeheartedly agree with what you’re releasing. You have to want these things because fake gives what fake gets; no follow-through and emptiness. Watch how your life changes right before your eyes. Watch how YOU change. There’ll be a little spring in your step, a bit more optimism in hard times, and you’ll be ready for every bit of Monday that comes at you.

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Self-love is selfish and it’s okay. It’s necessary.

No one is going to love you the way you will.

You know what you need & what you deserve and when it comes to taking care of you, you’re the best one for the job. Don’t let people make you feel bad for taking an impromptu trip to clear your mind or taking a day off of work to just relax & decompress. Do what you need to do, because if you unravel & break down, at the end of the day, you’ll be the only one there to pick yourself back up. Do what you have to do to love & care for yourself. You need it.

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Realize that self-love doesn’t equate to unending happiness.

Happiness can definitely be a result of self-love, but because you’re human and life is life, sadness, anger, depression, and disappointment will still knock at your door. The beauty of this love, though, is that you’ll recognize those negativities on sight and will have more of a drive to push through them instead of wallowing in them for too long.

You loving you is more important than you loving others.

There’s an alarming amount of women that give and give and give but are giving to the point of personal emptiness. Girl, how are you going to share from an empty cup? You have to fill yourself up to the point of overflow so you can willingly provide your energy to others if you choose to. We have to stop giving so much of ourselves to the point where we’re burnt out. Take care of yourself. Replenish what you’ve put out, share the wealth, and continue that cycle.

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As much as we emphasize loving how we look and how we feel, nothing really changes us more than the deep-rooted love we hold on the inside. Your love will transform into a strength you never knew you had and that’s when your humble journey will become your lifestyle.

Are you ready to love yourself? Comment below your favorite part of this article!

This article was written by #SelfishBabe: Jewel

Jewel is a NYC native with a love for traveling, writing, and laughter. An HR Guru by day and writer by night, Jewel finds peace in sharing advice on educational & career choices, relationship woes, and the greatest love of all: self-love.

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