How To Be Your Unapologetic Self by Living Your Truth
In the words of Aubrey Graham, more affectionately known as Drake, “it's a celebration, clap-clap, bravo / Lobster and shrimp and a glass of moscato.”
What are we celebrating you might ask? You sis! I know, I know, you’re probably wondering what you’ve done to warrant high praise. I’ll tell you of course.
You clicked on this post, which (I hope) means you are ready to start living a life authentic and true to yourself.
That’s not an easy task, so baby boo, I salute you.
At the beginning of this year, my girlfriends and I took an oath to make this our best year yet. We understood that if we wanted to see a change in the direction of our lives, we needed to change our way of thinking to reflect the life that we ultimately see ourselves living.
Nothing profound there, right? Boy, was I wrong. I spent the first half of this year doing things that I thought would push me towards the life I wanted; and with that came a lot of failure.
It wasn’t until one of my girls sat me down and flat out was like “shit ain’t working for you because you’re too busy living the life others expect of you.”
Now, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to fight her, lol. But I couldn’t be mad because she was absolutely right.
Through our conversation I realized that while I have a clear vision on the values that are most meaningful to me, I was, at the same time, out of touch with my deepest and truest part of myself which, in turn, made it ridiculously easy to follow societal and familial norms.
I was simply operating of autopilot because I wasn’t being mindful of my truth and that shit isn’t cool. I thought back to the oath me and my girls took and like always (‘cause life is one funny bitch) the answer was right there: I had to change my thinking.
If I want to live a life that’s true to me, I needed to expel all fear of confusion, doubt, and judgement and shift my mind to accepting everything that makes me feel whole even if it’s at the expense of the scrutiny of others.
Here are a few tips I think will help you start living a bomb ass life where you are basking in your truth:
1.Seek Clarity: There’s a lot of bullshit and background noise that can easily cloud our minds.
I want you to think about the last time you felt totally yourself. A peak moment of life when you were in your element, when everything just felt… aligned? Grab hold of that and really identify what core values made that moment so special. Done? Those values that made it such a defining moment is what’s going to continually propel you forward even when you feel like everyone/thing is against you.
2.Make Fear Your Best-friend: 99.9% of the time (not a verified statistic but stay with me) we are scared of 1 of 2 things: taking a leap of faith or being judge.
My reply to that: fuck all of that noise. I truly believe fear is a good thing. In my opinion, it’s directly aligned with your intuition. Fear tells you that the outcome of your actions is either going to be really good or really bad; but your intuition cancels all that. How do you know if you’re doing the right thing? You feel your intuition screaming Yes!
You feel expansive, not restricted. You feel challenged rather than forced. You feel pulled rather then pushed. You enjoy the struggle rather than despise it. It’s liberating. It’s freeing. It’s exciting. It’s fulfilling. That’s your truth. When you understand this, what the fuck is fear?
3. Your Truth Is Your Light: Once you start fully walking in your truth, I promise you’ll begin to notice how much the judgment of others goes away and turns into praise.
It’s kinda hard to ignore someone who radiates happiness and light. You can be a person like this once you’ve released the fear of other people’s judgment and scrutiny. As long as you remain honest with yourself and are accepting of who you are in the moment, there is no way you won’t shine bright like a diamond. (Ok I’m done with all the corny song references.)
To put it plainly: Be courageous and strong. I know it’s a lot to ask but once you get to the other side of whatever is holding you back from living your best life you’ll feel so free.
Fear isn’t as scary as you think. Rather than run away from it, run in to it. Think of it as your edge, your advantage, your secret weapon.
There’s immense growth waiting if you face it and work through it. It’s your damn life and you only get one of it. So do what you want, how you want, when you want. Life is too short to be concerned with the useless ass opinions of other people.
If your truthful life brings you joy and love, everything else is secondary.
Comment below your favorite part of this article. Ify dropped some MAJOR goodies in here.
This article was written by #SelfishBabe: Ify
Bio: Ify is a born and raised NYC native with big dreams and an even bigger taste for creative writing, self-development, and pure happiness. Clinical oncology researcher and (future) MD by day and an avid traveler, wine connoisseur, and blogger by night. She just one girl hoping to inspire conversations on all things controversial, raw, honest, and meaningful.
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